"You are my sweetest downfall, I loved you first, I loved you first."

Dear friends.

Sweet, sweet Carolina Town. My home that I love. I still feel as though I never want to leave it sometimes. But I know adventures wait beyond that which I can see, and that all things come to an end eventually. Spring changes into Summer, Summer into Fall. And then blows in the winter, cold and strong and dazzlingly brilliant. A changing of seasons. Still, I will enjoy my time here, however long it may be.

Summer is ALWAYS nostalgic for me. More than any other time. I think it's something in the lingering summer evenings, so beautiful as the sunlight spreads it's golden fingers across everything within it's reach. And it just makes me breathe deeply and think. Oh memories, so precious and so few, of climbing the trees and swinging from the branches, of swimming and picnicing and running until my feet gave out. I so closely relate to Deathcab's song Summer Skin right now.

"Squeaky swings and tall grass
The longest shadows ever cast
The water's warm and children swim
And we frolicked about in our summer skin

I don't recall a single care
Just greenery and humid air
Then Labor day came and went
And we shed what was left of our summer skin

On the night you left I came over
And we peeled the freckles from our shoulders
Our brand new coats so flushed and pink
And I knew your heart I couldn't win
Cause the season's change was a conduit
And we'd left our love in our summer skin."

Really, without meaning to, I've begun to grow up. How did this happen?

Don't get me wrong. I'm still so young, and still so ignorant of the world around me. But not quite like I once was. Here is the transformation into something new, and hopefully beautiful.
This is always the season where I most feel like crying, even if I don't actually shed tears. I think it's the sadness of losing something so precious, of growing up and having to leave behind a bit of innocence, a pinch of carelessness, a smidgen of wonder.

Also, though, I know that there is joy in growing older. I gain wisdom, learn prudence, appreciate character, acquire patience and kindness and self-control. I gain responsibility, but with that privilege. I can enjoy new aspects of life, and do things I couldn't before, go new places.

I simply think the change is worth it. It's inevitable either way, but I think I'll choose to look forward to it. And at the same time, I'll enjoy these last few years as a teenager. I'm turning 18 the end of next year. What a weird thought.

Love.